Latest Tweets:

sangorox:

when a fandom you’re not in gets an update you don’t care about

image

(via pizza)

The Dunder Code! I completely forgot about that prank. That had to be like six or seven years ago. Stayed late every night for a month. Had a lot more free time back then.

(Source: theofficescreencaps)

*1
That swan looks pretty white to me…

That swan looks pretty white to me…

17yr:

adults: “what are your plans for the summer?” “what are you planning on studying in college?” “what do you want to do in the future?”

me:

image

(via hebrewnomars)

achievement-hunter:

whodattbooty:

omfg you suave little shit

that kid’s got more game than I do wtf

(via ruinedchildhood)

celestial-sexhair:

pretzelscavenger:

vondell-swain:

i marked this broken fan so i could set it in the hallway and one of us would remember to throw it away tomorrow but i immediately got really sad because it makes it look like it absolutely hates itself

ill be honest before seeing the caption i thought this was some pretentious art student photo about the frailty of the human condition depicted by a common household object that lost its primary function


I think we all did

celestial-sexhair:

pretzelscavenger:

vondell-swain:

i marked this broken fan so i could set it in the hallway and one of us would remember to throw it away tomorrow but i immediately got really sad because it makes it look like it absolutely hates itself

ill be honest before seeing the caption i thought this was some pretentious art student photo about the frailty of the human condition depicted by a common household object that lost its primary function

I think we all did

(Source: itsvondell, via sociallychallengednerd)

bloodyhellhermoine:

draycen:

ccesamestreet:

spydercyde:

obsessionthenarglesmademedoit:

But why the last one thoughwhat am I not getting

I can’t breath…I have not laughed this hard in years 

Okay, quick story about the last one- I go to this school too, and the creative writing teacher is rad as hell (like the kind to give out free coffee on fridays)
After all of the kids have submitted their short stories, he reads them all for the first time to his two kids, who help him grade them, in a way.
One time, a girl wrote a story about a sheep, named Trixie, making her dream come true by moving to the big city to become an actress, a singer, or whatever (he was pretty vague on the description) 
She took a bus and a few trains and finally ended up in the ‘Big City’, where she tries to make her dream come true.
Now I dont remember the exact sequence of events that came next, but Trixie the sheep eventually ended up becoming a prostitute mid-sentence.
Our teacher didnt really realize this at the time, since it was his first time reading it, and to his kids he was caught completely off guard. And lets just say he had to explain a few new concepts to his kids that night..
And that’s why we can’t write any more stories about Trixie going to the Big City.

I lost my shit at 21

'garfield gets feline leukaemia' 

bloodyhellhermoine:

draycen:

ccesamestreet:

spydercyde:

obsessionthenarglesmademedoit:

But why the last one though
what am I not getting

I can’t breath…I have not laughed this hard in years 

Okay, quick story about the last one- I go to this school too, and the creative writing teacher is rad as hell (like the kind to give out free coffee on fridays)

After all of the kids have submitted their short stories, he reads them all for the first time to his two kids, who help him grade them, in a way.

One time, a girl wrote a story about a sheep, named Trixie, making her dream come true by moving to the big city to become an actress, a singer, or whatever (he was pretty vague on the description) 

She took a bus and a few trains and finally ended up in the ‘Big City’, where she tries to make her dream come true.

Now I dont remember the exact sequence of events that came next, but Trixie the sheep eventually ended up becoming a prostitute mid-sentence.

Our teacher didnt really realize this at the time, since it was his first time reading it, and to his kids he was caught completely off guard. And lets just say he had to explain a few new concepts to his kids that night..

And that’s why we can’t write any more stories about Trixie going to the Big City.

I lost my shit at 21

'garfield gets feline leukaemia' 

(Source: media-cache-ec0.pinimg.com, via thewriterkid)

turkey-imported-from-maine:

firelorcl:

meladoodle:

i wanna be a reverse tooth fairy where i rob people and then scatter human teeth on their bed

a dentist

i dont know what your dentist is doing to you but i think you need to go to the police

(via thewriterkid)

nivena-the-fallen-angel:

If anybody asks me what Tumblr is, I will show them this picture

with absolutely no explanation whatsoever.

(Source: nivena, via likepotato)